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| "Pacific Currents" by Rev. Dr. Mary Susan Gast,
Conference Minister, November, 1999 The Gift of Forgiveness
On Monday, August 23, 1993, I was in Gugulehtu, outside of Cape Town. It was a time of turbulence in South Africa-politically, socially, racially. Laws that had held apartheid in place were gone, but free elections were still 8 months in the future, and no one knew if they would really come to pass. There were powerful forces in the land intent on fomenting violence that would keep South Africans terrified of the move toward democracy and show the rest of the world how un-ready South Africa was for government of, by, and for the people. Our guide that day was Fr. Basil Von Rensberg. He laid out the area's history and current struggles for the ten of us visiting from The United Church of Christ, USA. Walking through the church building we noted the list posted on newsprint of procedures to be followed in order to maintain safety at funeral services. Leaving the township we read the fierce graffiti on wall after wall. The next day we flew to Johannesburg and then back across the Atlantic to our homes. That Tuesday evening, probably around the time our plane took off, Amy Biehl, from Newport Beach CA, drove a friend home to Gugulehtu from the University of Cape Town. Their car was attacked and Amy was killed with stones and rocks thrown by a group of young men. Fr. Basil Von Rensberg officiated at her memorial service. I knew nothing of this until, after the long hours in flight and a night's sleep at home, I walked into my kitchen and in an attempt to re-orient myself to North American time zones and current events I flipped on the Today show. Peter and Linda Biehle-Amy's parents-were being interviewed. I still remember the cold linoleum under my bare feet as I gripped the edge of the Formica counter and hunched myself toward the 12 inch TV screen, piecing together what had happened. While my mind was scrambling for facts and motives, my heart was entirely captivated by these obviously grieving people who with absolute grace and deftness would not be cornered into demanding vengeance no matter how often and relentlessly the interviewers shoved them in that direction. About 30 years earlier, as a teenager, I had stood transfixed in front of another grainy TV screen and received my first soul-jolting lesson in justice and healing. At that time of great turbulence in the United States-politically, socially, racially-a church was bombed in Birmingham AL on a Sunday morning and 4 girls were killed. Denise MacNair was one of them. Her father was interviewed by TV reporters. There was a flurry of questions. "Do you want to see your daughter's killers brought to justice? Do you hate all white people for what these men did? Will you seek the death penalty for them if they are found?" Mr. MacNair spoke to the heart of the matter from the heart of his pain and his convictions: Of course I want the killers brought to justice-who could bear to leave them free to do this again? But to have them executed? What would be the point? Their deaths will not bring our children back to life. The only way we could inflict upon them the suffering we are enduring would be to kill their children-and then truly we would all have gone mad. We ask a lot of our law enforcement agencies and our criminal justice system: Keep us safe. Protect us from violence. Secure restitution for the victims of crime. Punish offenders. Maybe rehabilitate the convicted criminals who can be rehabilitated. But none of these will heal the wounds of those maimed, those whose loved ones have been murdered, those who have been unjustly accused or imprisoned. There is however, a healing balm that can be lifted from the pharmacopoeia of the Gospel. When I returned to South Africa in 1994 to help monitor the elections, Archbishop Desmond Tutu had just preached a sermon on forgiveness. Everywhere I went I was assailed by black South Africans who were eager to engage a visiting minister on the topic. "We must forgive what we dare not forget," they told me. "We are not glossing over or condoning if we forgive." "If we do not forgive, we ourselves will be trapped in the prison of the past." I told that story to a group a couple of years ago .Afterward a man came up to me with tears in his eyes and said, "It's so true." Later I learned that his daughter had been killed in one of the "Unabomber's" explosions. Forgiveness. It cannot be mandated. It must be a gift-a gift that benefits the giver much more than the recipient. And I still do not know for sure whether only the spiritually strong can forgive-or if it is the act of forgiving that gives strength. ~ Mary Susan |
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